Here are some lyrics just for you!! ;)

I Wasn't Prepared For This by Eisley

Oh, when the day is blue
I'll sit here wondering about you
And how the pollen fell
All around your face in strange yellow patterns

But, I wasn't prepared for this
Oh, I wasn't prepared for this

When the morning came
The bees flew down
And wrapped themselves around me
And that's when I spoke the word
To have them trace your face for me in pollen

But, I wasn't prepared for this
Oh, I wasn't prepared for this

Come, come back to me, my, my darling
Come, come back to me, my, my darling

I wasn't prepared for this
Oh, I wasn't prepared for this

When the day is blue
I'll sit here wondering about you

waiting and waiting and waiting some more

I hate that I want this so much. . .


































But I love it, too.

Evie B)

Wow

The Phil Whickham and Charlie Hall concert was incredible. The music was perfect, the audience was really into it, and there were hands outstretched to God everywhere you turned. What a perfect night it was.

Evie B)

Hoping, just maybe, just maybe

I want this to happen so badly, but I am terrified of getting hurt again.
I want to believe that maybe this time it really is different.
I want to connect to somebody on that level.
I want somebody to call at the end of the day.
I want somebody to call me the end of the day.
I want to not make a fool out of myself.
I want to feel that fire when everything is right.
I want to let go of this petrified feeling that the rug is going to be pulled out from under my feet.

Those are all things that I want, but I only want them if it is what God has in mind for me. I want His timing most of all, no matter the waiting period. Saying that is beyond difficult, but it is what I want. At the end of the day, I have to believe that God will really do what He said He would do: take care of me. My personal cry is, "God, let it be right this time and don't let me screw it up."

Evie B)

God is Incredible.

I cannot get over that fact.
His timing is perfect.
His ways really are higher than ours.
His love is perfect.
His justice is complete.
His mercy never ceases to amaze.
His arms are always open and, the last few hours especially, I am in complete awe that my God truly is EVERYTHING He says He is.

Evie B)

The Colors Inside My Head Are Swirling

I wonder who reads this blog. I have it open to the public, so I guess anybody could just stumble upon it, but I really do want to know. I think it would be really funny if one day, I bumped into somebody that recognized my picture from the blog. That would be great.

I am officially back in NM. I drove up to Salt Lake on Wednesday and drove back on Saturday. I' m still kind of tired from it. All yesterday, my legs were all bouncing from being in the car for eleven-ish hours. It just starts to feel like you're riding no matter what you do if you drive that long. Oh well, like I said, I'm officially (long term) back, and I don't have to drive up there for a long while. I'm happy about that. This last trip was just a confirmation that moving back was the right thing to do. I was talking to my buddy, Matt, and he pointed out to me that if I hadn't of gone to Salt Lake, I would have always wondered. That is such a good point, one that had not occurred to me. So, thank you Matt, for saying that to me. The past three, going on four, months have been the strangest of my life. I have decided that the older I get, the weirder things get. I am excited about the weirdest, though. For the first time in my life, I am by myself, with no dictations being put on me, and it's truly fantastic. I have really been enjoying getting to hang out with new people and nourishing relationships. I learned so much about myself in the SLC time, stuff that I wasn't aware of. There was also stuff that I was completely and utterly aware of and I got enough down time to understand why I am that way. Being forced to learn about myself was difficult. I had to deal with some of the garbage that I had been awesome at holding onto. I am by no means perfect, never will be, but I feel another part of me has been healed. God is good, that is the understatement of the ages.

That is the thing that has been replaying my mind, that God is good. My brain works that way, I tend to ruminate on one topic, sometimes good, sometimes bad, sometimes, most times, both. I stopped trying to figure out why my mind works that way, but that is something I will not know. In the long run, it doesn't matter why I work that way, it is me and I'm good with that. God makes everybody a certain way so that we can introduce new ideas into another individuals life. It just goes to show that God isn't dull. He is very unique and takes enough time to weave different thought patterns. Billions on earth, and each one with a distinct personality. I don't have a way to calculate how long it takes for a personality to be built, but I'm thinking its a while. Wow. Cool, God; thanks for the time and effort.

Ok, that is all I have for now. Love you, folks. Bye Bye


Evie B)

P.S. Fleet Foxes + driving through fog and snow covered mountains = a tiny glimpse of heaven.

Revelations.

Tonight, I sit in complete awe of the way that God works in my life. I don't deserve His uncompromising love, and never will, but He is always there waiting to take me back. Wow. I will never understand that, but, you know, I'm thankful for that too.
Miss E. B)